12
July

Freedom means Caring

Each year brings trials….triumphs and memories to last forever. Mine are unique but, so are yours!

I challenge myself every day to free myself from the “rear view” mirror of the past as I once stated – and strive to always focus on what I am free to do now!

I have to say I am so very fortunate to have loved ones and family ones who have helped me… and support and “gather” together with me quite often. This year, as we have done many times in the past, we celebrated the 4th of July at my home with a bang!

It was a very special day with all the fixings one could imagine and with such a holiday smell on such a festive occasion. It was one done each year while remembering my own childhood and seeing the “new” little children light the fire-works and run around giggling at the end …. was just icing on the evening!

However, the 4th of July has many different meanings to many different people. For many, I found it has no significance.

For me… and many of my families discussions over the last few years – it rings for the foundation of “Freedom”.  I myself have gone from from being told – “This is it Mr. Green” as if my life was to be to a strapped whell-chair bound forever to walking on my own … against all rear-view mirrors I’ve looked through or how many specialists have led me toward that path called  “hopelessness and helplessness”. I know I am “free”!

There is no history lesson here but, merely acknowledgement that there is indeed many things we are blessed with….we ALL are indeed “free”…..our body, mind, feelings, actions and soul that I view as though many may take for granted…. no matter what the circumstance!

However,  this position of “freedom” for trauma survivors, disabled and the like are quite different I believe!! There is not much freedom in such a state of mental,  physical and social confinement! I found and find it very hard to view this term in full meaning from my lens at times in all honesty. In reality, there is no freedom going from being 6 feet 1′ to now just under 4 feet in a wheel chair where accessibility to “life – freedom” (friendships, mobility, jobs, security, sociability, intimate relationships, etc…) is though having to live on a different planet at times!

As I think more of this concept more and the rights of those who lived historically before me and the rights I had and have now…. I reflect how abusive and misinformed we are to people who are different! History has proven this repeatedly and the world is currently and constantly in a racial, radical, real, ridiculous, religious, righteous, etc…. battle across the globe – at all times! Even within my own city, I have to fight particular battles and wars daily…. as do all who have gone through some form of a trauma; and additionally interact with the “carelessness” process of the misinformed and society regarding the disabled.

I wonder what ever happened to that word care? When did we stop teaching our children about the true meaning of the word? When did “WE” stop caring about our own? I must have missed it?

From my experience, even from the beginning of my trauma and from the medical team treating me, I wondered where was the care? There can be no freedom without “care” – Especially within your own community!

As I sit here 6 years later with current images and so many experiences over the past, I still wonder the same. There is no true “freedom” in being disabled! Despite the challenges – I know that I am not a prisoner either!

The point is, many of the liberties and luxuries that are made to be enjoyed are just not made available to too many survivors. I know this to be true and can be proven to easily!

I ask you that despite the condition of your loved one – give “hope”. Hope breeds a sense of inner “freedom” that I believe breeds growth. We all need that!

If your loved one is in the hospital or a board and care facility – please know it’s a war zone there when alone! In my experience, I found one generally has to battle for his or her life in the very place where one is there for quality care, help, and sanctuary. Based upon my experience, we need dramatic change into the health “care” system of those in charge of people we think care about us.

I can never forget the look in the eyes of the doctor’s, neurologists or the assortment of  whom I  refer to as terrorist nurses (who intimidate, promote fear, physically abuse and drug patients)  that I would say scared my soul forever and others I saw and would suggest as well. There are too many stories that come to mind to tell within this blog.

However, I must state that there are the nurses that possibly win the love of your family over as well  – and when your family is gone … so are they! There were too many nurses who actually physically or psychologically harmed me where I was drugged, physically abused and tortured. I was provided indelible looks of “I don’t care” and the absolute lack of true care from who I thought, hoped and prayed to be highly trained professionals who I put trust and my life in; and from many I encountered a lack of competent and socially acceptable communicative skills.

My message and  highlight to the reader is to BE THERE for your loved one!!

Let them have some “freedom” toward hope! For me….among other things – Freedom means Caring!

Freedom is truly being free….isn’t it? Despite, one’s limitations – It is a choice you have to make for yourself!

Freedom is liberation … For the disabled – adapting, growing, exploring, possibly/hopefully finding you!

Freedom is being able to be present, bold, and open with potentially a “new you” … a new life… new fireworks… a new BANG!

Freedom is being unrestricted – No-one controls our minds!

I ask you – do you “CARE” to be free? ….. Let your loved one be!

 

 

 

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